Anonymous said: how do you ladies feel about parents having sex (making lots of noise along with that) when they are right across the hall from their fully aware child(ren)? idk, this used (and continues) to happen to me, and I've accidentally walked in on them at least twice. this happening to me really scared me as a kid (and now), which makes me furious, because It makes me feel really disrespected. i dont want to hear that. (ive discussed this with my mom, but she doesnt care) but how do you feel about it?
I think that sex is natural and that expecting your parents not to have sex out of respect for you is kind of weird, actually. Sorry if this isn’t the answer you thought you were going to get.
It doesn’t strike me as disrespectful for grown people to have sex in their own home. What DOES strike me as disrespectful is a child living there (presumably) for free that expects a parent to curtail their behavior out of deference to them.
Walking in on parents having sex is uncomfortable and can be traumatizing. I totally get that. It’s why it’s a good idea to knock before you go in somewhere. A rule that we always had in my house when I was growing up and I never walked in on a parent doing the do. Conversely, my mom never walked in on me doing anything I didn’t want her to see either. That courtesy when both ways, the knocking thing.
My parents are big pot smokers. It always bugged me as a teen. It was embarrassing to have friends over. (Ask Shannon sometime about the time when her mom busted my mom smoking weed when Shannon was getting dropped off for a sleep over in high school. Awwwwwwkward.) I used to make up excuses, “it’s the cat box” was a good go-to, when I had friends or study groups over. It drove me nuts. But it was her prerogative to do in her home as she felt. She was the person paying rent. She was the person feeding me and driving me around and taking me to school and making sure I had clothes and tickets to that Green Day concert. She was a good mom. Her vices where gross to me, but that wasn’t any of my business.
Your parents are allowed, nay HAVE EARNED, the ability to have sex when they please in their own home. As long as they’re behind closed doors and aren’t forcing you to watch (which is a form of sexual abuse) they’re totally in the right.
I’d suggest investing in some good headphones, making sure to knock before entering closed rooms or making a plan to move out as soon as you are able if your parents sex life is that upsetting to you.
I just need to add that without your parents sex life, YOU WOULD NOT EXIST, so being tolerant of their continued attraction for each other is probably a smart move.
[text: A diagnosis of a mental illness does not have to be the end of your story.
Photo: Stephen Fry and Carrie Fisher, text: Both successful actors. Both diagnosed with bi-polar disorder.
Photo: Terry Pratchett, text: Had written over 40 books. Kept writing after his diagnosis of Alzheimer’s disease.
Photo: Abraham Lincoln, text: 16th President of the United States. Ended slavery. Suffered from recurrent depression and suicidal thoughts.
Photo: Florence Nightingale, text: Founder of modern nursing and social reformer. Heard voices, had symptoms consistent with bi-polar disorder, and accomplished most of her great works from her bed.
Photo: Dr. John Nash, text: Won the Nobel Prize for his work in mathematics. Diagnosed with schizophrenia.
Text: Never believe that you are useless. Everyone can find a place in this world.]
Play a C next to a C# and it’ll probably sound horrible to you. You might even call it wrong or bad. The sound goes to war with itself. It clashes. But take the C up an octave, and it becomes a major seventh. One of the most beautiful chords. It’s almost too nice sounding. When we see something bad or awful, maybe we’re just looking at in the wrong octave. We just need to change our perspective a little. Countries all over the world build bombs with the goal of hurting people, instilling fear, and killing, to prove a point. To try and change your perspective about an idea. Governments everywhere even bless their bombs for this purpose. Maybe we need a different kind of bomb. Maybe a bomb that makes people love you. Maybe a cupid bomb. I believe we already have it, and it’s called music. Every country has their own version of it and it works. It changes your viewpoint by bringing each other together. And you don’t even have to know a thing about it to get it. And in the end maybe all you really did was change the octave. Music is a language, a lifestyle, and it could just save the world.
IT’S #LABORDAY WEEKEND! As we honor the workforce, kick back & enjoy the celebration with a little classical music hand-selected just for the holiday:
Bizet’s Carmen, the story of factory worker who gets in over her head, Aaron Copland’s Fanfare for the Common Man, Virgil Thomson’s The Plow that Broke the Plains & Verdi’s Anvil Chorus from ‘Il Trovatore.’
What are you listening to?
YMF posted this today, bass power!
(From Left: Teddy Gabrielides, Me, Ryan Baird)